Monday, March 30, 2015

Let do a Giveaway!!

Good morning! 
Who's ready for some free stuff?! 
Out of the top 10 New Year resolutions #1 is to lose weight & #5 is to stay fit and healthy. I really want to help more people reach their goals, in fact I have a specific number of people in mind that I want to coach, but I need your help. 
So here's a fun #giveaway!! 

Help me spread the word about #teamFitForGlory
Would you repost, like, & share my IG page, FB page and/or Twitter page? 
Win Hip Hop abs and Insanity Sweat fest by, the one and only, ShaunT. I will announce the winner on Thursday and send out your prize in time for you to join my next fitness group! 

Each action is an entry. 
Join me & my team as we get #FitByFaith2015 here's how:
≫Follow me on Instagram @iHOPEdaily or @meli_vette and repost the giveaway picture with #iHOPEdailygiveaway then let me know you've done it, I'll be checking. 

For additional entries:
≫Follow me on Twitter @meli_vette
≫Like/Share my Coach page on FB {FB.com/coachMelissaIvette}

≫Follow/Subscribe to my blog {MelissaIvette.blogspot.com}

≫Sign up for a FREE Beachbody account with me as your coach  ❋no strings attached❋ this ensures that you don't already have a coach and I'll be yours for F R E E! {https://www.teambeachbody.com/signup/-/signup/free?referringRepId=412428}




Saturday, March 28, 2015

tips to overcome the 7 year itch



a few things i have learned to overcome the "7 year itch": 
-we should never get married to be happy. that is dooms day waiting to happen. 
-when a problem arises don't wait for your spouse to fix themselves or fix "it". instead focus on working on Y O U and what you can contribute to the solution.
-changing your spouse is impossible, the moment we realize that truth is the moment we are released of much stress and unnecessary pain. 
-having an attitude of gratitude will take your marriage to new heights. 
-say "i love you" & kiss daily.
-never complain to outsiders what you deal with privately because opinions are one-sided so you'll never get the right advice.
-speak positivity into the life of your mate (if you want to keep them forever).
-choose to understand (that means listening first) instead of blaming.
-if you scramble the letters in the word (L I S T E N) they spell SILENT, so be quick to listen and slow to speak. 
-use your words to edify instead of tear down, chances are that your spouse knows most of their flaws already so don't be quick to point them out. 
-say what you want! speak into existence that which you want to see happen because what you speak becomes what you believe and what you believe becomes what you will see.
-a love that lasts and grows stronger together begins by becoming a team/a partnership so look at your spouse as your teammate rather than an opposing team member.
-be clear about you want and don't want, what you like and don't like. don't assume your spouse should know.
-in moments of high stress and hard times it's ok to take a step back analyze the situation separately then put your heads together and make a game plan to kick that problem to the curb. 
-God really, Really, REALLY needs to be your source of strength, your connection point, meet at the cross. 
-marriage is not guaranteed to be clear, perfect, a straight path, a walk in the park, in fact, I can assure you it'll be tough, but you can make it through with the right attitude. 




this sunday we turn 7 years old! 
well our marriage is 7, we are proudly ::30-something:: year olds.
i was contemplating the "seven year mark" by now a couple should 
have mastered a ton of different skills, right? they say that the 
seventh year is the hardest BUT i just know it will a phenomenal 
SUPERNATURAL year. this is the year we break free of debt, do 
things we have never done and change the direction of our future. 
i am so confident of this because it has already been promised to 
us. i believe that our influence in the christian community will 
reach new heights. i believe that we have been set apart to set 
up a future for the kingdom of God by undergoing transformation 
in ourselves. i am in no way trying to boast or brag but my spirit 
is in such a state of expectation & excitement, i can't contain it. 

what we believe we speak, what we speak we do and what we do becomes 
who we are. 

who we are speaks to others. 

my husband and i have always set out to do God's will above our own. we have 
had times of plenty and times of lack. we have come to realize the ugly parts of 
us that need change and a touch of God. we have struggled and we have been 
triumphant. we have gone through seasons of having pennies in our bank 
account and seasons of hundreds in the bank and none of which has given me 
more security than the other. if i'm being honest i'd rather have little money 
in the bank but lots of faith in God because He always amazes us and comes 
through. one of our dreams is to live on 50% of our income and give away 
the other 50%. we never want to have the burden of a mortgage either. i 
know it sounds crazy, to others, but we believe for a paid-off home. we will 
never have a car payment again either. we believe for paid off vehicles too. 
it's gonna happen. we are also going to pay off debt for others. i believe we 
have been blessed to be a blessing. nothing is "ours" it's only been lent to us 
in order to see how we will manage it. i believe this will be our year of giving 
back and giving more away. 
by God's marvelous grace.

thinking about the 7th year and all that it means. i thought "we are still kids in this road of marriage" so i decided to google what the average 7 year old child should know, and i came across this.....by 7 years of age a child has:
1. improved literacy skills (reading & writing) offer experiences that dramatically expand experiences
application in marriage -hopefully by this time we have a good amount of experience and a good grasp or understanding  as to how we are to deal with/love our spouse correctly and we have become better spouses

2. better interaction of language 
application in marriage- we learn to speak how we feel in honesty without trying to hold back for fear of our spouses feelings (sometimes it works against us too...whoops) but we learn to express what we really want and not just be a people pleaser. 

3. demonstrated their understanding through discussion
application in marriage- we talk it out more instead of wishing the problem away or pretending it is resolved, this is developed maturity really.

4. vocabulary that continues to grow 
application in marriage- through our communication we grow in understanding our spouse better and his/her needs

5. a more developed and engaging sense of writing
application in marriage- our "love letters/love notes/texts/greeting cards" to our spouse we become much more specific and meaningful after years of being together, hopefully we learn that sweet spot that we lost after the early stages of dating.

6. a strong number sense and estimation skills
application in marriage- haha, number sense & estimation skills? well that can be self-explanatory, has any wife out there spent a little too much money and worried about the consequences or that "talk" from our spouse? yea, thought so. 

7. a typical preference of structure and routines
application in marriage- by this time we definitely have a routine in our day-to-day activities, especially once kids enter the equation because every moment has to be accounted for.

8. chosen to work or play independently when frustrated
application in marriage- we definitely learn the need for "me time" or personal time to come back with your head in the game and focusing together as a team. 

9. the capacity to understand others' actions and feelings
application in marriage- we learn each other better (self-explanatory, right?)

10. increased their knowledge of art elements, materials, techniques and processes
application in marriage- yes! in all aspects.



7 years truly is just the beginning of a thriving future. i have heard so much about the 7 year itch, which is described as a period where interest in your spouse diminishes. i only believe that people that give mind to that myth will succumb to it's suffering. 


 i hope this inspires and blesses someone. i am certainly still learning and growing but i would not have it any other way.
choose to be a life long learner.
i pray blessings over your current/future marriage.

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Monday, March 9, 2015

Date nights!


For our last date night we went to see Cinderella and I loved it. It had been a while since we've seen a show together and  it reminded me of the importance of having regular date nights. 
Do you mind if I share with you some great reasons to keep date night alive?

  

If you'd like to have a stronger marriage, I encourage you to continue to date your spouse. Here's some points from an article that I found:

(1) A date night is an opportunity to communicate, really communicate uninterrupted, which helps couples “deepen their understanding of one another and the relationship.” Communication is important because “individuals continue to change,” and over time, “as they and their relationship develop, they experience new challenges and problems,” Wilcox and Dew point out.
(2) Date nights are valuable for their novelty. Researchers are discovering that “couples who engage in novel activities that are fun, active or otherwise arousing – from hiking to dancing to travel to card games – enjoy higher levels of relationship quality,” the report notes. In this way, couples counteract a tendency to take each other for granted. Couples, it says, “may be particularly likely to benefit from a regular date night if they use it as an opportunity to do more than that old standby: dinner and a movie.” And couples are encouraged to choose activities that represent “a balance of each partner’s interests, rather than tending to do things (novel or not)” that reflect the same partner’s preferences each time.
(3) The report says “date nights may strengthen or rekindle that romantic spark that can be helpful in sustaining the fires of love over the long haul.”
(4) Date nights may strengthen a couple’s sense of commitment to one another. The report says, “Partners who put one another first, who steer clear of other romantic opportunities and who cultivate a strong sense of ‘we-ness’ or togetherness are markedly happier than are less-committed couples.”
(5) Date nights are a way to relieve stress. They allow a couple “to enjoy time with one another apart from the pressing concerns of their ordinary life.” Date nights also may serve couples as an opportunity “to extend emotional support to one another in times of trial.”
*article found on focus on the family website*

I hope this was helpful, I enjoyed reading it and personally could not have written it better. One thing I would add is that date nights allow you to focus on each other and I would recommend having a great belly-laughing session together. Regardless, whether or not you and your spouse have stressful lives --laughter is a healing regimen. The Bible says that laughter is medicine for the soul and I thoroughly recommend laughing together. It has great healing powers. 

Love, Melissa


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